Gay Sex - What Does The Bible Say?



Gay marriage is a civil right, not a special right.


Gay sex? As believers in Christ, we are born again by the Spirit of God and the word of the Gospel. We are partakers of God's New Covenant of Grace. What the Old Testament prophets foretold, though aimed at Israel, has come true for us as Christians.
"Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of Judah:

Not according to the covenant that I made with their fathers in the day [that] I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt; which my covenant they brake, although I was an husband unto them, saith the LORD:

But this [shall be] the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel; After those days, saith the LORD, I will put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their hearts; and will be their God, and they shall be my people.

And they shall teach no more every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the LORD: for they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the greatest of them, saith the LORD: for I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more. Jeremiah 31:31-34



Brides atop a wedding cake.


Our hearts have turned to God through faith in the shed blood of our Savior, Romans 3:25, and we have a desire to follow Him. But how do we follow Jesus?  

Jesus said: "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you.

Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.

Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and [that] your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.

These things I command you, that ye love one another." John 15:13-17



Gay symbols


Loving behavior toward each other is the most important commandment according to Jesus and Paul, Matthew 7:12, 22:36-40, Romans 13:8-10.

Love is the basic command of the New Covenant. Gay sex for some gay Christians, seems to mean an anything goes attitude. They believe that gay sex is okay if consenting adults are involved, regardless if they are committed to each other. For them, sex is nothing more than recreation.

In the New Testament, Christians are called to operate under what James calls the "Law of Liberty," James 1:25 and the "Royal Law," James 2:8. Any discussion about gay sex and how we engage in a sexual relationship must be informed by what the Bible says about our loving treatment of others.

Don't be deceived by the big lie of gay sex!

One of the greatest lies of this age is the lie that says sex is nothing more than recreation. Sex is not simply recreation and gay sex is not simply recreation. Sex is either lust or love. When we get intimate with someone, we open ourselves up emotionally, physically, spiritually.

Whether we are aware of it or not, when we have sex, we are communicating either lust or love. If our actions are not truly based on love, we may appear loving but appearances can be deceiving. Sex apart from love is really nothing more than lust.  

Many gay and non-gay Christians reject this view. They say sex is not like that for them. Many people are confused by gay sex and sexual relationships. They cannot tell the difference between lust and genuine love. When they have sex, because physical intimacy creates at least an appearance of love, they mistake the physical intimacy of sex for love.

Some people are lonely and desperately need companionship which meets their deepest intimacy needs. Gay sex with someone with whom you are not in committed partnership can never meet your deepest intimacy needs.

When you express love by the physical act of sex outside a committed partnership, knowingly or unknowingly, you misrepresent your true feelings and your true intentions. Gay sex apart from a loving, committed partnership can be deeply hurtful because it creates false expectations.  

What about one night stands? Since there are no expectations, no one will get hurt, right?



Gay grooms atop a wedding cake.


Wrong. Often what both parties intended as a one night stand becomes something more in the mind of one party. Sex by its very nature implies loving care.

When gay sex occurs outside a committed partnership (outside the bounds of loving care), when sex is nothing more than recreation, great harm is done.

One manifestation of this harm is the inability to form a lasting partnership. When people condition themselves to view sex as anonymous (with someone to whom you are not committed) or as recreation not linked to committed partnership, they sabotage their ability to form lasting marriage partnerships. The powerful reinforcement of orgasm conditions them emotionally to avoid permanent partnerships.

Our sexuality (including gay sex) can be a wonderful blessing or a difficult burden. If we think about our past experiences, oftentimes, our greatest hurts are not physical but emotional and spiritual.

So how should authentic Christians (gay or non-gay) employ God's gift of sexuality? What is our responsibility concerning gay sex? Surely, our first priority should be the other person. This means we must act responsibly.

Knowing the awesome power of sex, including gay sex, we should wait to have an intimate sexual relationship until we are willing and able to follow through on the love we communicate. That means we should wait to have sex until we are in committed partnership.

Does the Bible say anything about sex and relationships?

"But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.

The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband.

For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." - 1 Corinthians 7:2-5, ESV

These verses give us a principle by which to make informed spiritual decisions concerning gay sex. The Bible views sex as part of a committed relationship. The Bible views a committed partnership as the safe venue for sex. In this safe venue, both are to meet their partner's sexual needs.

Therefore, sex outside the bonds of a committed partnership is sin. In I Corinthians 7:2-5, sex outside a committed partnership is viewed as sexual immorality.

How should gay Christians treat each other?

Jesus loves You!


Gay Christians ought to care about one another emotionally and spiritually as well as physically and sexually. Spirit led Christians should have the wisdom to see the terrible damage that can be done by people hopping from one bed to another.

As gay Christians, we should avoid gay sex outside of a committed partnership, not because of legalism but because we truly care for one another. For gay Christians, gay sex should be reserved for committed partnerships.  

We "are not under law but under grace," Romans 6:14, but that does not mean we are free to do things that harm the body of Christ. 

"All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be enslaved by anything." - I Corinthians 6:12, ESV
In Christ, we are free from the Law of Moses. We are no longer servants. We are friends of Christ, John 15:15. As people who know God personally and as a body of believers, we have wisdom to consider what is beneficial and what is detrimental.

Gay sex outside a committed partnership is detrimental. Let's make a conscious decision, as the body of Christ, to change our sexual behavior, to glorify God and model the love of God to others. 

-Written by Brother David (UK) and Pastor Rick (USA)

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